Put on Your Grown-Up Pants

As many of you know, a couple months ago I got the fantastic news that I had landed a bonified grown-up job at the state capitol.

Upon receiving the wonderful news that I, arguably one of the biggest political science nerds on the planet, would be working in a state capitol, I did a few happy dances, jumped up and down, screamed like an 11-year-old girl at a Miley Cyrus concert, and generally acted-a-fool while my boyfriend alternated between beaming with pride and gaping in utter amazement at my dorkiness.

Then, the dread set in.

Shit. This was a real grown-up job, and I was going to have to dress like a real grown-up.

Previous to being laid off, I had been working from home, cultivating an impressive talent for working on spreadsheets and sending hundreds of professional, upbeat-sounding emails while sitting on my couch in yoga pants, listening to NPR, and intermittently snacking. Before that, I had been working for the same company doing pretty much the same thing, just in an office chair in San Francisco instead of my couch, and in jeans instead of yoga pants. My other resume items included the typical student-in-her-early-twenties staples: waitress, hair salon receptionist, and barista.

Needless to say, dressing like a grown-up was not something I had any inkling of how to do.

I get the whole standard corporate attire of pantsuits, pearls, and pumps, but wearing stuff like that makes me feel like a five-year-old who decided to raid her mom's closet during the 1990s and play dress up. That shit just doesn't look right on me. Also, I hate it.

 Ok. Those pumps are pretty cute...

The first thing I did (after drinking too many oatmeal stouts to celebrate my new-found jobbiness) was call my friend Jessie in a panic. Jessie has lots of experience talking me down from fashion ledges. She knows that I need to be talked to like a rabid hyena about to chew its own leg off.

"Here's what you need: 2-3 pairs of pants, 4-5 shirts, a pencil skirt, and a pair of black heels."

Thank goodness for Jessie. That sounded do-able, if still kind of daunting. She also told me that Nordstrom Rack was the place to go for shoes.

Anyway, here's some things I learned  from my first grown-up clothes shopping experience:

1. Buy the shoes first

Unfortunately, you might have to spend a little more than you want to and/or think is reasonable to spend on shoes. So if you're on a limited budget (which you probably fucking are if you're reading this blog), get those first. Then you'll see what you have to work with for the rest of your purchases. Plus, then you will have them to try on with stuff like pants and skirts, which is key for shorties like me.

I ended up taking Jessie's advice and getting these at Nordstrom Rack. They were like $50, but they're seriously worth every penny. They are pretty cute, and most importantly, VERY comfortable. I found another pair that was cuter and cheaper, but I could tell they were going to be very painful. Don't kid yourself about the pain factor. I know we all have at least one pair of incredibly cute shoes that makes us bleed and break out in blisters, but are so fabulous we wear them anyway. Taking your shoes off or limping around like an ostrich with broken ankles might be ok when you're blacked out drunk at 2am at a club with Lindsay Lohan, but it's definitely a grown-up job FAIL. Save cute but painful shoes for the weekend. 

2. H&M, though pricy, is kind of the shit

H&M has great button-ups for $10-$20, which is decent for a staple wardrobe item. Their pants and pencil skirts are also fan-fucking-tastic, and $30-$40, which is kind of pricy, but I think it's important to get at least one office appropriate pair of pants or a skirt that you really love. It makes dressing up for work more enjoyable.

3. Try not to look homeless 

I know that you can probably find some halfway decent shit at Goodwill or Savers as far as grown-up clothes go, but while I advocate shopping at low-end thrift shops like these for many things (see post on thrifting for spring trends), I do not recommend trying to find grown-up job clothes there. Most of it is going to be ill-fitting, from the early 1990s, in poor shape, or some horrid combination of the three. Best case scenario, you walk out with 2 or 3 passable items after spending the better part of your day digging. Worst case scenario, you talk yourself into buying a bunch of just ok shit because it's "good enough," and you are positive you won't be able to find anything else for a decent price. Just don't. Not worth it.

Instead, go to higher-end low-end thrift stores like Crossroads Trading Co. (in the Bay Area), Everyday People Clothing Exchange (in Minneapolis), and consignment stores like My Sister's Closet (also Minneapolis). You're more likely to find fashionable stuff in your size at places like these.

I got a great pair of pants at My Sister's Closet for $14, and decided to return one of the pairs of pants I got at H&M, effectively saving about $20.

If you have a car, or a kind friend with a car, I've also found that thrift stores in the 'burbs or more yuppified outlying neighborhoods can also be excellent for finding grown-up office job clothes because (a) the bitches who drop their clothes off there are rich and (b) the bitches who live in those neighborhoods don't really do much thrift shopping (see point a.), so you have less competition.

4. Work with what you have

After finding some great deals on pants, blazers and skirts, I still didn't really have any shirts. I got one button-up, an adorable J.Crew blouse and a cute white cotton cowl neck (all for less than $20 each), but that was simply not going to be enough. That's when I started frantically going through my dresser drawers and closet. To my surprise, I found that when layered under and/or paired with my new purchases, some of my everyday clothes started to look kinda grown-uppy. (See pics below.)

5. Make It Fit

If you are blessed with a supermodel figure, then you probably don't need to read this section. Also, fuck you.

However, if you are not "perfectly" proportioned, you're probably going to need to get some alterations done. Whether it's getting a bust adjustment on a dress or top, or getting your pants hemmed (which is ALWAYS the fucking case for my 5'2" ass), find a badass tailor in your neighborhood and get your shit altered. Because most grown-up clothing has a very tailored silhoutte, it's important that it fits you correctly.

In Oakland, I recommend Snow White Cleaners on Piedmont. In Minneapolis, Song Tailoring & Alterations in the Skyway at 811 Lasalle Ave. in Dowtown. Stacy Mc, one of the most fashionable ladies I know, rustled up these recommendations for tailors in the NYC area: M&N Cleaners (cheap and awesome),  Wilfred (for fancy dresses, etc, a bit more expensive but worth it.), and Campos & Campos.

6. Don't Deny Your Personality

The biggest mistake I've made when shopping for work-appropriate looks, is buying things I don't really like, but feel like "grown-up" me should wear. For example, personally, I am not a huge fan of the classic, collared, button-up shirt or pantsuits.

BORING! Except for the "come hither" look on her face. What's up with that?

Anyway, I bought a couple reasonably priced button-up shirts because that's what I thought grown-ups with office jobs were supposed to wear. Turns out, I've only worn each of them once or twice.

Instead, I've taken to pairing pieces I already owned: girly blouses with cardigans, or cowl neck sweaters and blazers.The lesson here? Don't buy stuff that makes you cringe. Sounds common-sensical, but it was difficult for me to reconcile my idea of what's fashionable with images of what successful women dress like.

I just cannot pull off a pantsuit...

I prefer to think of my work style as "the poor woman's Michelle Obama." Looking like a political diva without wearing a pantsuit.

Here are a few looks I've put together that I think are work-appropriate without making me want to vomit on myself and crawl out of my skin:

Monday

J. Crew blouse from Everyday People ($15), black pencil skirt from Target ($20)

Tuesday

Forever 21 blazer (free from clothing swap), gray t-shirt, and black Target pencil skirt (again)

Wednesday

Strapless black and white dress that I already had with Forever 21 blazer (again)

Thursday

Forever 21 blazer and scoop neck short sleeve sweater with H&M pants ($39.95)

Friday

J.Crew cardigan from Everyday People ($17), white scoop neck t-shirt (Macy's $19) with H&M pants (again)

Anyway, I think the key to dressing like a grown-up when you are a fashionably broke chick is to set a budget to buy a few key pieces, experiment and re-work outfits with the cute clothes you already have and love, and be yourself--just a more polished, grown-up, office-appropriate version of yourself.

Thanks for reading, and if you have any awesome grown-up outfit ideas, pics, or advice, please please send them my way: hallee.berg@gmail.com.

<3-hallee